historyREFUSE

Unknown Monday, June 20, 2011
other says that we should have to be tight-lipped about our past
but for me it is important to know your past especially if we have that distinct connection.
experience and truth about the past might hurt or affect the present situation
but it's part of knowing and relatively it can contribute to a much stronger relationship.
why is it hard to reminisce the weak past?
after all you did had a great time until you realized that you made the wrong choice.

a certain reading material just answered me:

it's because...
  • You'll be turned off - we all make mistakes. Understandably, we'll suffer from being judged. But, what hurts the most is when the ones giving the judgmental look are the people we care for the most. Like, let's say, the person we're in a relationship with. Baka iwanan niya pa ako pag nalaman niya ang totoo.
  • You'll keep bringing it up - imagine how much bigger the fights would be if she knew about the mistakes I made before. In other words, we're not too keen on loading bullets you can shoot us with. Sure, the past helps explain the present. But, in problem-solving, focusing on the present issue is a lesson we both need to learn.
  • You'll be unreasonably jealous - being jealous is good. But, when it gets to the point of paranoia, it just complicates what could be a peaceful relationship. When your partner shares his/her past with you, s/he trusts you with it. The next best step is to reciprocate the trust.
  • It's not that important (for us) - this is perhaps the most common reaction you can get when asked about the past. And, it's exactly what annoys you, right? However, someone said, "my past helped me become who I am right now. I'm not sure you'd embrace my past by the same way I do. Just love me for who I am."
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nevertheless, what's wrong if i'll be turned off, if i'll keep on bringing the idea, if i'll get jealous and though it's not important to us? that's just a proof that i want to know more about you, that i'm concern about your past, that i'm willing to help you become a better person now, and after all i will still love you.

you let me love you, so let me know and be informed regarding your history,
don't let me be the one to discover the things you want to hide from me,
perhaps it happened already and I know how to forgive and forget,
so don't refuse to reveal it all to me.
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pero sige panalo na kayo, magpaparaya ako ngayon.
sabagay, oo may point naman talaga kayo.